I'm seriously considering changing the name of this blog. To 'superskinny'. Or maybe 'wispofawoman'. I've also considered 'superfit', 'ieatcrunchylettuce', and 'scrawnychicken.'
Why? you ask? in your shrill voiced, frightened way... *SIGH* Leettle grasshoppah, come hee-uhre. I shall enlighten you. It is after all one of my favorite jobs, enlightening the world with my brilliant flashes of insight.
I've come to the realization that by referring to myself as 'reasonablychubby' I'm doomed to suffer with perpetual plumpness. Yes, it's a cute name. Adorable if you ask me. ReasonablyChubby... it rolls off the lips, and makes me want to eat a whole stick of butter. BUT.... I'm reinforcing an image of rotund roundness in moo-wah's mind. (I realize 'suffer' is a relative term. If one considers eating cheesecake 'suffering' then so be it. And sometimes I suffer and take midday naps. When I could potentially be outside sweating in 100 degree weather burning additional calories.)
So, you see? If I refer to myself as the self-disciplined, tiny boned woman that I really am, ( *see above picture* ) I IMMEDIATELY get a craving for broccoli and sparkling water straight from the tap. Or, 'agua' as I like to call it.
Yes, that's another benefit. Thinking of myself as the tall, world traveling, you can't see me when I step behind that stop sign, my gawd her cheeks are sunken that woman must never eat supermodel that I am, I immediately gain the ability to speak fluent Spanish. Taco, burrito, quesadilla, fajita, salsa, cheeps with lots of salt, queso, rice and beans...
Adios amigos!
7 comments:
Um, I think you might be BRILLIANT, oh paper thin whispy woman. I'm going to follow suit...just call me, stunningly gorgeous, no lines on her face, perky boobs, flat abdomened looks way less than 41 and inspires me to be a better person, Lisa. (I just went down a pant size)
So funny. My mom would be standing and applauding you on this one. She is a HUGE proponent and follower of the whole "what to say when you talk to yourself" school. In fact, she has told me more than once how bad it is that i ever refer to myself as chubby,. fat, whatever. So, let me know how this new "school of thought" works out for ya!
So if I change my name to 'wins the lottery drives a ferrari sleeping with brad pitt can eat brie daily with no effect to arteries', this will work as well?
BRILLIANT!!!!!
Darn, DariasDigs went for "wins lottery first" name. If I try no wrinkles here or always 39 do you think I'll never look any older?
Hmmmm... You may be on to something. Maybe my new name should be calm mind, clean house, looks good in a bikini lady.
Maybe if I repeat it enough, it will be true.
Yes, my friends--you are getting it! Hahahaha! And I agree with Beach House, I am so mad that Daria took 'winsthelottery'-crap! I forgot to be rich and thin. Habla espanol?
Ladies,
We do realize that I only got there first because I was the pathetic loser sitting at home at 8:30 on a Friday night blogging, now don't we?
But diligently trying to register my new name with blogger since then. Why won't it take it? Too long ya think............?
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