Friday, April 23, 2010

I Always Did Love Kindergarten, Especially Art!

Look how happy we are. My friend and I. We're giddy with joy! We've just discovered we're bonafide arteests...the lady at the shop told us we were. And I quote, "You cannot mess up your picture. You are bonafide arteests." I'm taking the lady's word for it.

Quick, somebody, where's my french beret?

I plan on taking the paint-by-number world by storm.

With the flourish only a true arteest posesses, I signed my gold.

Using a magic marker.

The life of an arteest is so misunderstood.

We're complicated, never knowing what we want, think or feel at any given moment. Take my picture for example. Do I want to sit down? Or, am I needing flowers, fake ones because I kill the other kind, to cheer my weary soul. Perhaps I just copied what the teacher did because that's what we were supposed to do. We'll never know, will we?

Hey kids! Look what you're getting for Christmas this year! I know, I shouldn't have, but you know what? You're worth it.

Next year will be even better. I'll paint our family portrait wearing my fancy French beret. And I might become a fireman or a superhero. I always did love art and kindergarten.

I Just Really Like Them.

I just really like her too, don't you?

These words are really like my favorite words in the whole world. Really. They just like, are. I can't explain why.

I. just. really. like. them. Really.

Unfortunately, these words and my fondness for using them as often as possible and then some, may be the demise of my "rich and famous" writing career. At least according to everything I've read about launching my world famous cookie recipe. I mean, writing career.

Like, they just might really, really destroy all chances of me being a world renowned author. Of course, I've still got my evil cookie empire plot as plan B, so no worries.

But still.

It ticks me off. And makes me angry. Now I'm mad. Furious, actually.

Who determines these "things" anyway? Like, I just really don't understand.

Okay, already. I'll move on and find other words. Bigger, more profound, intellectual words. Words such as obsequious, which means fawning attention, or ameliorate, which means to lessen.

I'll start wearing a tweed jacket and smoking a pipe. In the summer and winter months.

I really will. I just will. And I'll like it. Really.

p.s. I personally found this post to be like really annoying, I just did. I'm going to go beat my head against a wall now, for real. (shorter variation of really) Anyone want to join me? In beating my head against a wall, I mean?