Sunday, September 26, 2010

For Reasons I Can't Explain


( lowercase ) bringing a period of rest.

 I'm calling it a Cooking Sabbatical. I'm 'bringing the rest' to my kitchen.  It's going to be  glorious.

1. Why?
    I am married to someone WHO ACTUALLY LIKES EATING CEREAL FOR SUPPER! One of his superior qualities, I might add.

  I will not go near the stove. I will act afraid of it. If I touch it, I will slap my own hand. I will barely get close to the microwave, and that's only in a moment of weakness. I will break out the can opener...and do a little jig.

This very moment. My official sabbatical started two seconds ago. However, my subconscious has been trying to convince me to do this for years. I think most sabbaticals last at least six weeks. By my calculations, that should carry me to the holidays. Whereupon I will immediately order our 'takeout' Thanksgiving meal from the local deli. Trust me, I've got it all figured out. I may never cook again!

4. Where?
The entire state of Alabama. And Georgia. And Texas. Let's just say The Entire USA=No Cooking Zone.

5. What?
About the human eating machine that has moved in? (aka teenage son who needs MEAT?)

Hmmm... Well, uh, um,...maybe he could learn to love cereal?
 Somebody needs to invent roast flavored cereal.

I think my next sabbatical will be the bathrooms...and then grocery shopping...and then the laundry...and then...