Tuesday, December 28, 2010

I've been everywhere man....

'This land is your land, this land is my land'...

The Great American road trip of 2010 is a success!!
2000 miles later...
 I told Mr. Wonderful, 'good thing we like each other, huh?' He nodded in agreement while stuffing pankcakes down his throat  faster than you can say 'uh, honey, you're going to choke'. That was in Coleman, Texas, in a stinky little diner where all the people we saw had on camouflage. All The People. The women, the children, the babies, EVERYONE. I think Mr. Wonderful was eating fast 'cause him was scared!

I told him not to worry, that Texans are known for their friendly waves, and drawn out 'hhhhiiiiii'sssss'. Maybe he was just hungry. We had to wait 45 minutes to be served since they made sure every.single.local.bubba in the joint was served first. And then, we reeked of cigarette smoke for the next 6 hours.
Yes, this is what I call FUN!

Okay, so here's the low-down:
1.Atlanta, Georgia
2.Pearl, Mississippi
3.Rockwall, Texas
4.Lubbock, Texas
5 San Antonio, Texas
6.Beaumont, Texas
7.Little ol' Fairhope, Aly-bamie

We've laughed, we've ate, we've laughed, we've ate, ect., ect., ect...
Oh, yeah, and I've bonded with every elliptical at every motel we've stayed at. I hate being disciplined. It goes against my nature.But all I have to do is glance at my pretty fingernails and remember that I LOST. That's when my eyes narrow into slits and I ask Mr. Wonderful if he can drive while I run alongside the car.

New Years resolutions are for sissies!! Bring it during the holidays baby!
(Now for my ear-piercing warrioress cry, and then jammies and bed!)

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Trust Me, She Deserves A Post...

See the woman below? Rudolph's twin sister?
The one known as Aunt Kay. (Or she'll step on your foot and crush your toes and snatch your twenty dollar gift card back until you do call her Aunt Kay...and say it with a smile, you little brat)

Yeah, HER. Well, I want to tell you something.

She was part of the package. The package that came with Mr. Wonderful I mean. She's his little sister, and I couldn't be luckier! First of all, I'm sure you can tell from her reindeer horns ALONE that she's fun! Throw in the shiny red nose, and what can I say? You gotta love this woman! 

And she's sweet. She loves her daddy and her mama, her children, her friends and her husband with everything she's got. She gives it her all...and it shows. She loves dogs, and cries easily and laughs loud.  She loves Jesus, and sings like an angel too. She opens her heart and her arms to the ones God places in her path.  So, I just wanted to say thanks Kay. Thanks for making me feel so welcome, but most importantly thanks for being you. 
And just because, I wanted to throw in this picture. Obviously Mr. Wonderful  loves his mama!  His eyes are glazed over with the look of adoration.
Or, maybe he had a few too many rum balls...

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Mama, I cain't spell no more

Ya'll, I'm getting old...or stupider. Or worse.  BOTH.

I USED to be a whizbang speller. I USED to be the go-to spell queen of my family, my friends, okay, I'll say it-THE WORLD! It's hard when you lose your identity. I mean, who am I now?

Am I still Mother of all mothers? Am I still everybody's favorite friend? Am I still a Realtor? Frankly, who knows...Then there are the big questions, the deep probing thoughts of life.

Am I still Reasonably Chubby?
Okay, yeah, everythings fine. I did the ol' thigh check.  I"m still me.

I just noticed I misspelled I"m...

Sigh. Oh, well. At least Santa Clause is real, and that will never change.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Hey, Lady, it's just a gift...

The great road trip of 2010 is in full swing, and as  I sit here in Pearl, M-i-crooked letter-crooked letter-i-crooked letter-crooked letter-i-humpback-humpback-i, (Pearl, Missippi that is)  I'm thrilled to say it's started with a bang!

The proverbial white elephant gift exchange with Mr. Wonderful's family. You've never seen so much hair snatching, smack talk with a distinct ghetto feel to it. As in, 'you touch my present, I will cut you'. And this was with a $10 price point.
Ahhhh, Christmas.....

Actually, it was all very fun and pleasant, especially with Granny's rumballs available whenever you needed one. More rum than ball, and not a switchblade in sight. However, we did have two very nice guests attending, two innocents from the great land of India.

Abraham and Reba. They were scared. I could tell from the look in their eyes...and they should be. Because we might not 'cut you' with our knives, but if you DARE touch my Walmart gift card which came disguised as a sausage roll, and I had to worry that I was going to get a big ol' log of gross deer meat turned into sausage, then felt the glee that it was really MONEY, don't mess with that. That's some strong emotion going on. Hey, where are the rum balls?

So, yes, we had a wonderful time! And we scored! My hands are lotiony soft as we speak, scented with  peppermint snowflakes,  and Mr. Wonderful is cozy in his new fleece pullover.  Except for the fact  Mr. Wonderful kept accidentally slipping into a fake Indian accent every time he conversed with Abraham. Sheesh!
I could swear I saw Abraham flash some metal at him...

Thursday, December 16, 2010

A little touch of bitterness has set in...

Hey everybody!
How are you today? Lovin' that Christmas spirit, looking forward to magical moments with friends and family and all that jazz? We're only 9 days away...

All that joy has been swallowed up in one horrible shocking moment, from which I am still trying to recover.

There, I said it, and NOOOO, I am not being a drama-queen.
Fact: I have been diligently tracking my food intake, ( I love sounding clinical about things that nobody cares about), AND I have also been sweating my buns off 4 weeks.
Fact: I have lost 2 pounds. (Hold on, I've got to scream into my pillow now)

My so-called friend, AMANDA, ( I hate to mention names, but I will when trash talking friends behind their backs. Of course, she usually reads this blog which makes it even better) who has challenged me to a death defying weight loss goal of 20 pounds by Feb. 1, has lost 6 pounds. While eating potato soup and grits...and not going to the gym for days!

How dare her????

Granted, she has been sick for a week, and hasn't been able to leave her house. But, right before our weigh in today, she said, and I quote, "Oh, I'm dreading this. You won't believe all the food I've eaten". Or maybe she said it right after, and saw with great joy that she had just won our 'mini-challenge'.
I get to treat her to a manicure/pedicure.
A hideous, vile, and evil something or other is out to get me.
Hold on, I've got to go throw eggs at a moving vehicle, or at least swing the neighbors cat around by it's tail...

Okay, I'm back. Wonder how many calories that burned?

At least my nails are gonna look pretty.

Monday, December 13, 2010

And then there were two...

My oldest child has graduated from college!
Now, she's headed off to the 'wild blue yonder' to make her fortune and prepare for my monthly white-gloved visits...(Once a mother, always a mother. ' Um, have you flossed today?' 'Darling, you need lipstick.')

No, the reality of it is she's moving to Colorado and she had to kick me off while I cried, clinging to her leg.
*Sigh*...children. Why don't they get it?  That, yes, we want them to leave the nest, but all that means is move across the street?! Otherwise,  how are we going to have coffee every morning together? How are my dreams going to be fulfilled with you happily nestled in a snow bank?  

Oh,'s not about my dreams. Ooopsie, I forgot!
Claire graduating from college with her degree in History has fulfilled one of my greatest dreams.
This road has not been an easy one, which makes it all the more...well, MORE.
More Joyous!
More Proud!
More Happy!
More Relieved!
MORE!! (Sung with a slight vibrato in the key of 'C')

Did I ever tell you Claire could barely read by the third grade? That I homeschooled her in the fourth grade, and drilled Hooked on Phonics, until we both wanted to die?! That she repeated sixth grade...?

You've never met a child who loved the silent 'e' more than her. When she wasn't sure how to spell a word, she'd throw in a few extra 'silent e's'  until it looked just right. Hey, they're silent after all...

In her fifth grade year, I walked into the bathroom after she had showered, and saw written on the steamy mirror..."I am stuuped. I hate my sef."  Takes your breath away, doesn't it?

Did I ever tell you she took honors classes in high school? That she was a peer leader, and went on to earn a dean's scholarship her freshmen year of college? Did I tell you she worked as a Nanny and helped with a little girl's  homework  for three years? A little girl who also struggles with school and because of Claire's own experiences, she had an understanding and patience that impressed her employers?
 Let the grinning from ear to ear begin...

 Sweet Brianna...
 Sisters, sisters...they're were never such devoted sisters...many men have tried to split them up and noone can....

Moppy and Poppy!! Hugs, and Kisses, and more Hugs and Kisses...

 Grandma and Ted! And more Hugs and Kisses!

 Daddy!! She always was a daddy's girl...

Mommy! Mommy, why do you have a vice grip around my neck? Yes, I'm still moving to Colorado.  Mommy, you're hurting me...

More grinning from ear to ear...

Hey, who's this cutie-patootie?!  He's happy we're about to go have lunch.

Aunt NeNe and Uncle Wayne! And Madi! Have we brainwashed you yet, that Madi should attend Lee?

Jackson and Cole and FIRE!!! Awesome!

Did I tell you that love never fails?  And that it was proven this past weekend when our family came together, in the spirit of love, and acceptance, and  forgiveness, and  joyfully gathered to celebrate together this momentous occasion?

Gosh, I haven't told you alot of things!! Meet me here for coffee tomorrow morning, I want to hear all about what's been going on with you, and tell you about my latest diet crisis...(can you say, 'arc trainer?')

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Why, Yes I Did, Thankyou for Asking

It's times like these and friends like you that make me want to...
Smile? Noooooo.... Scream with the agony of defeat? Maaayyybeee...
 Why? Because, Father, I have sinned and I would really prefer to confess anonymously  from behind a thick curtain. The curtain of shame.  But no. Instead I will post my foibles, my flaws, my terrible gluttonous tendencies on the world wide web for all to see and Judge.

Let me put it to you this way. I hath eateneth more than I shouldeth...

Spark People was no match for Turkey Day. The motivational talks, the promises I made to myself, the tracking of the food...wasted. Totally wasted.   My downfall began with TWO FABULOUS Thanksgiving meals, one with turkey, one with ham, then a football party, laden with marvelously fattening hors d'oeuvres, where in fact Mr. Wonderful tried to keep me from having dessert. BIG MISTAKE. I had the World Wrestling Federation threaten to sue for stealing some of their most famous moves. (Once I had him in the headlock, punchdown, knee-in-the-groin twist around,  he knew it was over. Give the fat girl her pie.)  Then a  road trip from Alabama to Georgia, and on to Tennesee.

But, I'm back now. I woke up at 5:30am, went to the Y, and DIED. This is my ghost writing these words...

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Two Magical Words

I have only two words for you today: 700 Calories
(In one measly little hour. I almost puked my guts up.)

Yes, I'm in bed now...

By the way, have you guys ever heard of 'Spark People'? Well, it's this totally free website that is AWESOME!!! You can track every single morsel of food that slides down your throat, and it will instantly let you know if you've sinned. It also lets you track how many calories you've burned. There are message boards, success stories, and all kind of tips to keep you motivated.

Face it, soon you'll be looking for me, wondering 'where in the world did she go?', and that's when I'll step out from behind the stop sign, the mailbox, or the tall lamp in my living room.

 If I believe I'm going to end up as tiny as a toothpick, then FOR SURE I'll at least make it to 'she's as small as a  volkswagen bug'... I prefer blue, if you have to picture it. Go ahead and make it a convertible.

Excuse me while I nibble on my lentil burger, all the while telling myself how it tastes just like beef...

Tomorrow we'll discuss how to get big muscles. Yes, I'm also in a class 3 nights a week called, "Body Pump". 
I have noticed I seem to speaking in a strong Austrian accent these days...


Sunday, November 21, 2010

I've just come up for air...

Hey guys!
Just wanted to say a quick 'hello' before IT finds me. The Elliptical I mean.
Sorry it's been so long since we've talked. It's the Elliptical's fault. We've merged and become one, and ever since last week when  I took my vows to be faithful and committed, things just haven't been the same.
For example, I now get up at 5:30am in the MORNING (yes, I capitalized to emphasize yelling) ...the Elliptical is very demanding like that. I wish you would have warned me. Now it's too late...The 'Y' has my money, the Elliptical has my promise, and my thighs are burning as we speak.

My life has changed forever. Or at least until February. That's when the winner of the twenty pound challenge will emerge, VICTORIOUS, and get to go on an all inclusive, totally paid for girls-get-a-way weekend at the beach. My friend Amanda and I are in this duel til' death throwdown.

Goodbye cream cheese. Hello celery, and broccoli, and dry toast.
Brings a tear to my eye...

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

I fought the Teal, and the Teal won

I fought the Teal and the Teal won.
And then I kicked it's little blue-green...well, you get the idea.

What is the Teal? Ah, yes. The TEAL my friends is my days long attempt to simply re-paint my china cabinet, from black to the oh-so-cottage look of the aforementioned color...and that's when my entire world collapsed. Who knew that bringing light and harmony and the feel of the ocean into one's home could cause such mayhem, despair, and cursing? With my fist raised to the china cabinet itself, I swore, "I'll never go hungry, paint you again!" And that's when the china cabinet laughed at me.

Because guess what? I did paint it again. And again...And then I spilled the paint. And got some on the wall. And the floor. And on a chair. Now, all the chair seats will have to be recovered. Who knows where this nightmare will end. Does this mean I will have to also replace the chandelier? Of course it does. The TEAL is beyond demanding.
I'll post pictures someday. For now, I've got to go change into my Samurai warrior diaper and wrestle this thing to the ground...If you don't hear from me, send in the clowns.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Blind leading the Blind

The time change has happened. As usual, the first moments are absolutely GLORIOUS! Leisurely waking up, glancing at the clock...ahhhhh,  it's only 7:30am...Fall Back has occurred!

And then reality sets in. Darkness. Deep, black, DARK darkness at 5 pm. Everyday. For months and months and months.

Good thing I'm a blogging, HGTV, cream cheese loving diva, for it is this, and this alone that will get me through!!

Hold me...

Thursday, November 4, 2010


Today I had one of  the most satisfying experiences of my life.  It was so great. It brings a smile of contentment to my face just thinking about it.

What?! what?? wwhhhhaaaatttt?????
Why, is that 'breathless anticipation' I hear?  I love breathless anticipation.

Since you're about to burst, and YOU CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE, I'm gonna tell you.

I witnessed a skinny bird-boned man unable to stop himself from pigging out on dessert. He stuffed his face until his belly hurt, shrieking 'what did you put in this stuff? Meth?' And then he went to get himself another piece.  Yes, folks, that man would be the naturally thin, non emotional eater, known as Mr. Wonderful. Before today that is.  Now, he's simply known as 'Potentially Chubby." My life is complete. I made the pumpkin ooey-gooey cake, from Ms. Paula Deen herself, and now that I know the power it contains, nothing can stop me! I shall rule my Chubby Empire!! (psycho laughter is completely appropriate at this point).

Oh, yeah, the other great and satisfying thing that happened was that I got mulch. Lots and lots of mulch put in the front yard, in the big, dry, plantless garden bed. It looks teriffic! Instead of lazy, no-good neighbors,  we  look like responsible homeowners. To reiterate, Nothing can stop me now! I'm aware of the fact that Mr. Wonderful burned many, many calories while putting in the mulch...Do you take me for a fool?  I promptly rewarded him with another hearty piece of ooey-gooey. He wolfed it down, and whimpered, 'More?'

 Real Men Mulch...and then bring their wives a bunch of wild flowers....Isn't that sweet?!
'Oh, darling, have another piece of ooey-gooey'...

Sunday, October 31, 2010

To My Dear Adoring Public

Dearly Beloved Friends, Fans, and Family,

Ever since I promised to run naked through the streets of Rome, WHEN I GET 100 FOLLOWERS, I have had NO MORE FOLLOWERS.

Except for two. And they're now my BFF's forever...Hugs and kisses ya'll...

Anyway, look, I've got to get to Rome. But before that can happen,  I have to get 100 people to follow me. So here's the deal. I'm gonna keep my clothes on-at least while I'm in the holy city. After that I make no promises.
This whole thing is a BIG surprise for Mr. Wonderful...he has no idea about followers, my nakedness in Rome, Rome itself, me using the Mastercard to get to Rome, or even making cupcakes here at home as the booby prize. I'm not sure he even knows what a blog is. So, if you won't do it for me, do it for him. He's never seen Rome...

Ok-fine. You can come with us...That will be a nice big surprise for him too.
See you in Italy...wearing only a toga...Uh?...Yes, togas are from Greece.
See you in Italy...FULLY CLOTHED...don't be afraid. Just follow me...


Monday, October 25, 2010

I went, I saw, I came home bitter

I've returned from my glorious rendezvous at the Country Living Fair...

We walked ,we shopped, we laughed with joy. Packed with creativity,  it was a feast for the eyes, and good for the soul. I came away inspired, rejuvenated, and determined to make my home look like a shop. :)

Then, I walked in the front door of my house.
Good God. I gasped in horror. For some reason, until this very moment, I hadn't realized I was living in a drab, lifeless shell of a home. Why, this is no better than a prison cell...
What's that ugly little chair doing over there in the corner? Who thought it was a good idea to buy a television and prominently display it in the family room? Where are the fabulous fabrics and ribbon and fresh mowed hay strewn upon my floor? What about the fresh flowers, the hand sewn quilts, the charming vintage everything, not to mention  ' what is that smell?'... 

Today is a new day people. I just spent 6 hours cleaning, I've lit every candle I own,  tomorrow I'll be painting, and the day after that, I'm going to build a tree house out back complete with stainless steel appliances, and vintage curtains...

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Brown Spots Are Pretty

Hey Ya'll-
I'm dashing out the door, headed to Atlanta to attend the Country Living Fair at Stone Mountain Park...I am so excited! But before I go, I wanted to share the traumatic event that scarred me forever.

Yesterday. There I was,  innocent as a lamb led to the slaughter, minding my own business.  I had browsed for a book, chosen one, and stood waiting patiently in line for 15 minutes. Finally, it was my turn. I smiled warmly, and said 'Hello! How are you today?'

She took my book, and...

 That's when the Goodwill checkout clerk asked, "Senior Discount?"

Time stood still. First, I quickly shook my head violently back and forth to make sure my hearing wasn't impaired...Did she say, "Senorita, would you like a discount?" I knew it was unlikely now that I've lost my summer tan. My mind was reeling, seeking an answer to this 11 YEAR age gap situation. Senior Discount?? I quickly looked down at what I was wearing, felt my face, touched my eyelashes, and thought about my roots...I WAS dressed, my makeup WAS on, eyelashes WERE thick, and black and full, just like the mascara advertised they would be, roots WERE highlighted with the sunkissed look of youth. So, I imagined myself slapping her across the face, hard. And it felt good, really, really good.
I snapped back into reality, and that's when I saw it. Her mouth curled into an impish, demonic little grin...Folks, I'm telling ya', it was evil, PURE EVIL checking me out at the Goodwill!

Well, I'm outta here. Gone like the wind in my KIA... into the loving arms of Atlanta...headed straight for the nearest botox clinic...

Monday, October 18, 2010

Dictator or President?

I woke with a start this morning and realized with total clarity,
'I should run the world.' Also known as my other oft realized epiphany...'Do I have to teach you people everything?' I also realized the house needs a good dusting, and soon.

I do it all the time. Have FABULOUS ideas that are SO OBVIOUS they would bite you on the boo-tay if they had teeth, but somehow are not being put to use.
What are they?
You mean, the ideas?


You can't put genius on the spot like that. It doesn't work that way. Duh...'do I have to teach you everything?!' (Ah, satisfaction. One good use of my oft realized epiphany)

I can die happy now, thin hair gently covering my no-neck. Don't even try to pry the candy from my balled fist, but most importantly, don't forget to bury me in black.

Can you believe I was actually able to get two men to marry me? I'm constantly spouting drivel like this, and still, they come in droves, begging for my hand. Well, two of them did. Not at the same time. I'm not into the whole 'brother husband' idea.

Ugh, can you even imagine? Large inhale, 'let's not even go there'...

Sunday, October 17, 2010

I'm In Mourning...

Today my metabolism died. Yes, today. As in fifteen minutes ago. How do I know? How does a mother know what her baby cries for? Because she KNOWS. And after 2 weeks of diligently killing myself on the torture contraption known as the makes me sweat buckets and almost pass out Nordic Track, I have actually gained a pound. It ain't muscle. Let's not play games. Sheesh! Trust me, I wasn't even doing it to lose weight, I came into Thigh Acceptance years ago, however...are you kidding me????

Yes I vaguely recall hearing about this at family gatherings. Old aunts and cousins sittin' around talkin about hysterectomies and leakage problems. I had no idea what they were actually saying.
This 'Middle-Age Spread , Death by Carbohydrate Consumption, Drop That Chocolate or You WILL Weigh 400 Pounds By Morning'. reality.
I thought FOOLISHLY it was an old wives tale. And that my mother simply didn't exercise enough.
But now I know the truth. And the truth will set you free.
My hair will thin. My neck will continue to grow extra skin. It will eventually disappear. My hiney will get wider. My candy addiction will grow stronger. My bladder will get weaker.  My candy addiction will grow even more powerful...give me sour straws or give me death! 

I'm going to go lay down for awhile, wearing all black of course.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

I'm Chained To My Computer Like A Common Criminal...

Folks, I'm taking a 3 HOUR online real estate course... it's information I already know.
I cannot even begin to tell you HOW BORING it is...

But I'm going to try. Because I need you to feel my pain.

1. It's as boring as eating non-salted saltines...which I've actually experienced since marrying Mr. Wonderful. It's an oxymoron for which there is no answer.

2. It's as boring as cleaning the toilets. With my bare hands. Wait, that wouldn't really count as boring, more like disgusting. And I have done it! Many times! Because I'm a slow learner and keep forgetting to buy gloves!

3. It's as boring as painting a room soft beige, after it's been light beige for years. I've actually never done this because it's against my religion. If I'm going to paint a room I want to see a change baby! Yes, I just called you baby, baby. That's prison talk with an attitude.

Well goodbye for now...if I beg you to break me out of here, don't. If I beg you for candy, do...

Monday, October 11, 2010

Gilligan, Is That You?

 "Hey, Dad,  you wanna go sailing"?

Hesitantly..."Sure..." Gulp. Life vest... Check. White-knuckled grip... Check. Come to Jesus meeting...check.  "Please God, don't let the boat tip over" it did on Saturday! Aaaaccckk.

The confident Captain, pushing out to sea.

Cape fear...

Isn't it pretty!!!!
Oh, that's me, yelling how beautiful it is.
"So, pretty! I love the sails! It's gorgeous!"
I'm on the beach taking pictures, jumping up and down, and clapping for joy.
The boys didn't seem the least bit upset I was too chicken to go. As a matter of fact, they left rather rapidly, as in "hurry, get in, before she changes her mind".

Two pirates and a daddy...

Headed off to who knows where. Maybe they'll find a sunken ship filled with treasure...a girl can dream can't she?

Goodbye men. And don't come back without some gold coins!

"My soul is full of longing

For the secret of the sea,

And the heart of the great ocean

Sends a thrilling pulse through me."

- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Am I The Only Sucker?

Am I the only one who's been sucked in to the strange world of the 'Sister Wives'?? Please tell me, have you watched any of this show on TLC?

Because I'm starting a support group for those of us who have.

Is it just me, or do you agree that the husband is getting to have a full-blown affair in plain view of his other three wives? They're all fairly old, fairly fat, and obviously same ol' same ol' by now. Three is not enough...EWWWW!

He's having a POLYGAMIST MID-LIFE CRISIS, and bringing his younger woman into the mix.
Weird? Yes. Strange? Yes. Bizarre? Yes.

What do ya'll think?

Friday, October 8, 2010

Hallelooyer, Fall is Here!

I was on the verge, the precipice of SNAPPING with the relentless 98 degree weather, when out of nowhere, with seemingly no warning, it was FALL.

THANKYOU JESUS!! I love fall.

Or AUTUMN, as I like to call it. With the word autumn lodged firmly in my pea-sized-ever-shrinking brain, I stroked my middle-aged bearded chin and began to ponder the great mysteries of life.

You see, this weather phenonmenon reminds me. It's all about seasons, and the moment you think nothing is going to change, that you might just die or wilt!!,  a cool breeze miraculously begins to blow...

And then of course,Winter arrives.With it's icy wind  and frigid days, we'll  break out the parkas and look  forward to Christmas. But then... we'll think we might SNAP from the mind numbing 18 degree weather and gray skies ... when out of nowhere, with seemingly no warning, the grass will miraculously turn green again.

 Hope. Things will change. New seasons will present themselves. Death, Life, Growth...Enjoy the wonders of what life brings. Unless you live in Hawaii. Then you have the same season continually, but really, I don't feel that sorry for you. It is HAWAII after all.

 Dear friends,

*Mend a quarrel. Search out a forgotten friend. Dismiss suspicion, and replace it with trust. Write a love letter. Share some treasure. Give a soft answer. Encourage youth. Manifest your loyalty in a word or deed. Keep a promise. Find the time. Forego a grudge. Forgive an enemy. Listen. Apologize if you were wrong. Try to understand. Flout envy. Examine your demands on others. Think first of someone else. Appreciate, be kind, be gentle. Laugh a little more. Deserve confidence. Take up arms against malice. Decry complacency. Express your gratitude. Worship God. Gladden the heart of a child. Take pleasure in the beauty and wonder of the earth. Speak your love. Speak it again. Speak it still again. Speak it still once again...

*author unknown*

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

When I Grow Up I Wanna Be A Raccoon

 Monday was my middle girl's birthday. Her 21st birthday!! This is how she celebrated...

I'm pleased to say she took seriously her vow when she was eight  'to never grow up and leave me.'

Oh, what shall she be?

A raccoon!
 A raccoon?

Personally, I've never seen a prettier raccoon in all my life.

Um...okay...I'm not sure if this, this raccoony type of look is going to be helpful in the husband hunting department. And I need grandchildren.

She did entice others to join her. Big sister...

Married college friend. Point taken.

Young Cousin...who is being influenced. Calling all flamingos...

'Train up a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they won't depart from it.'

Throw in a dog show, and you've got yourself a real celebration!

Monday, October 4, 2010

Dream A Little Dream...

 She married young that first time...and try though she might, her heart would be broken. She had three pretty daughters and worked hard to provide for them all the things they needed.
Sometimes she would get tired.
But, she let herself  dream... 

 She dreamed of finding true love someday. Of finding  just the right man, a good and just man to give her heart to. After 17 years of waiting, and hoping and dreaming...

 She met him! His name is Jack, her knight-in-shining-armor. He too had experienced heartbreak. But he let himself  dream...
Of love, and family and second chances.
And somehow, God orchestrated the whole thing. You see, she had to decide to move back home, to pack up her stuff and move clear across the state. She had to start attending the little country church near her house...
where she fell in love with the pastor.

And he? He had to trust again, to let love in, to take a leap of faith.
They were married on 'Cowboy Sunday' and the bride wore boots. She'd never had a real wedding before.   But now, she did. This is my dear cousin, Tonya, and I hope her story gives you one more reason to dream.

It won't be all roses and fairytales, this new life of theirs. Sometimes things will be hard, there will be misunderstandings, and hurt feelings. But there will also be love, and laughter, and good times. Lots of good times. There will be knowing glances, and  friendship,  foot rubs and warm embraces. There will be love. More and more love.

"Dream a little dream of me"...

Saturday, October 2, 2010

A Small Burst Of Scary

Sometimes, I suddenly get a CREATIVE burst of energy. And then I immediately do something constructive and worthwhile...

Pretty scary, huh?! I know...

A bonding moment. "Hello, my pretties."

                                                        I'm really on a roll now...

It is truly amazing I have this much free time...Time to make my father into Tinkerbell's little helper...
Hello Daddy!

Don't give me any trouble. I'm serious about my creative work.

Yo, this is art people.
Whatever. Alabama is kicking Florida's hiney right now...