And Then You Die...

This first picture is about love...And if for any reason this is their last day on planet earth you will always have this photo, this sweet, huggy photo as your final memory. And you will always question, what exactly WAS  Mr. Wonderful trying to do?

While the picture below is about hate.

Pure unadulterated HATE. What unholy thing did this to me?? What could have possibly caused me to lose my mind and put my au natural middle aged face on national TV  this blog, for everyone to see??

NORDIC TRACK!!!!

Spawn of Satan and Rosemary's baby all rolled into one enormous piece of hideous machinery!

You gettin' my drift? Yo, dat thing be evil.

 I melted into a jillion tiny pieces of light, and saw my last brownie flash before my eyes.

And then I went and took a shower.

What do you mean, Is that really me?!

Happiness Is...

Remember the other day when I threw a hissy- fit and Demanded a new camera? After sobbing and  writhing around on the floor for awhile, I wiped my tearstained face and looked up at our coffee table. Not only did I give a little smile of admiration for the table itself ($2 bucks from a garage sale, looks like Pottery Barn...) BUT I also saw you-know-who. My little *droid* friend.  He winked at me, and said, "Come here my love. I am not only a phone, a computer, a masterpiece of human intelligence, I AM A CAMERA!"

And so I give you my newest "piece de la resistance"
AKA: Pure Joy!

See this? This is my new 'Fall' purse which I just purchased at TJMaxx.

And this my friends, is my AS SEEN ON TV purse organizer. Purchased for a mere $4.99, it has not only changed my life, its saved me countless hours of worthless digging into the bottomless pit of darkness, known before this moment as, well, the bottom of every purse I've ever owned.   Not only has this brought a song of joy to my heart, cashiers around the world have lifted their voices in unison to sing Hallelujah!

 No longer do they have to wait while I dig for that dime, I just know I have one... feel around, feel around...exhausted, I come up for air and  blow a small piece of lint off my index finger...feel around, feel around... Here it is! Wait, no that's a penny... 

As a parting gift and because I thought you might be as nosy as I am, here's a closeup...if this isn't itimacy, I don't know what is...

I Hope You Don't Mind I Put Down In Words...

 On this day, many, many, many...many years ago, in a galaxy far far away, called West Texas, an adorable little child with big dark eyes and a head full of dreams was born...

 her name was Barbara Carol. We just call her Mom. I love you mom! Or Mother.  Have you talked to Mother? Or Moppy.  I wub you Moppy! Happy bwirfday Moppy! I miss you Moppy! What did you get me for my bwirfday Moppy? Moppy, can we go shopping?  She entered the world with a song in her heart and a glint in her eye.

I'll never forget as an awkward fourteen year old looking through my mom's old high school yearbook.  There she was, on a separate 8x10 page, voted "MOST POPULAR". Wow!!!  It was like I'd just discovered I was related to a movie star.

 "Mom, what was your secret?"
"Secret?", she replied.

I pointed to the poster size version of her stardom.

"Oh, that? I was just myself. Trust me, you'll be popular too. Be nice, be friendly, no problem."

Ah, such naivete.

My mom.  She's bold,  and one of a kind. She almost always  'goes for it!' It's one of her very best qualities. Even if the rest of us are huddled together in fear...She's pushing us, calling out to us, encouraging us.

DON'T BE A CHICKEN!

She and my dad were high school sweethearts. She met him at a church social and when she found out he worked at the local grocery store, she bought gum and went through his checkout line. Every. Single.Day. Until he noticed her. Then, she married him.   My mom has loved my dad for 50 years now. From young love to old love...

Here we've reached the talent portion of this little docu-drama. My mother is a garage saler LIKE NONE OTHER! Excuse me while I go change into my 9th grade pep squad uniform, complete with pom poms.

It's cheer time!

"Go mom! Get that lamp, buy that chair, you're the best EVERYWHERE!! whoo-hoo!"

I just tried to do the splits. Not a good idea.

Anyway, one time she found a Tiffany lamp, a REAL Tiffany, at a garage sale for $15.00. And then she sold it for boo-koos of money.

She really is like a movie star.

Did I mention that she gardens? In fact Mr. Wonderful and I got married in my parents backyard. It was so beautiful! One enchanted evening, the perfect setting for a new beginning.

Mom.

We've had countless talks about life and love and God and faith. We've argued and cried, and made up. We've laughed until we cried, vacationed, and painted so many rooms I've lost count. We've been together in good times and in bad times, and times so sad the depth of it seemed insurmountable. 

But there's always Halloween. My mom. She's wacky and funny and fun, and never more so than when she gets to put on a costume. And act like she's butchered someone.

 Here's to you mom.

I hope we have many more Halloweens, and long talks, and chances to love and laugh and pray together.    Happy Birthday!

I Want It Now!

Just call me Veruka... " I WANT IT NOW!! "
A fancy schmancy camera that takes breathtaking pictures that I can make even more fancy schmancy using photoshop!   I WANT IT NOW!!   I WANT IT NOW!!

Veruka Chubby. I think it has a nice ring to it.
I'm going to go suck my thumb and rock in the corner for awhile...