Friday, May 21, 2010

Help! I've Fallen And I Can't Get Up!

  Dark and  mysterious...what does it all mean? And why is there a neon light involved? Am I having an 80's flashback? These are the questions you're asking yourself.
No I'm not.
Yes you are.

Aha! A clue! Yes, friends this is a skating rink. A rink so old, so dank and dark  I thought it resembled the bowels of hell. Plus, the floor was bumpy. Floors in skating rinks should not be 'bumpy'.  It makes it difficult to twirl. I'm all about the twirling.

See this man? This man is so much more than "just a man." He's a roller skater extraordinaire! He's poetry on skates, a ballet dancer on wheels. He's cool, he's smooth, he's FLASHDANCE and FOOTLOOSE all rolled into one. He is Skatecity.

C'mon, he says...It's easy. Nothing to it. It's FUN!
Lies. All lies, and he looked me right in the eye when he said it.


An innocent lamb led to the slaughter. Look at that face! So full of hopes and dreams...
What an idiot.

Two SECONDS later. That's how long I skated. It's hard for me to remember if it was fun or not. I didn't enjoy the "my life is flashing before my eyes part", but other than that I'm pretty sure I had a blast.

This is the last picture. I took it from the ground, whilst laying down.
 She remained upright at all times, all smiles and laughter.
Mr. Skatecity couldn't even look at me, so deep was his disgust.
Or maybe it's that I requested the song "Dancing Queen" right in the middle of his leg lift, double axel, roller derby splits move.  It doesn't matter. Because let's face it, this activity has been ruled out as a shared life passion. Maybe we'll take up weeding together.


Organic Motherhood with Cool Whip said...

Hahaahahaha!!! What a hilarious post. I'm quite sure if I tried to go roller skating these days I would end up in a face plant with people rolling over me. Thanks for visiting my site today via Alex at Late Enough. She is the cat's meow. With a side of jello of course. I love your site and I've signed up to follow/stalk you. See you again real soon.

Cheeseboy said...

Ha ha! This is so 80's. "Poetry on Roller Skates" should totally be my next band name.

Lisa said...

Okay, no, YOU FUNNY. You so funny I foeget to choj you foe pedique. I'm following you, too. Mostly because you skated, as I was a lover of all things roller and rink as a youngster. But only if they'd play, "Good bye Michelle, my little one..." (we had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun...) Ah, good times!

Beach House Living said...

Very funny. Sounds like my snowboarding adventure. Face down in the slush and unable to roll myself over while still attached to the snowboard. One good thing there are no photos of this disaster.

The Pendle's -- 3700 Mtn Cove Rd said...

Have you forgotten that your dear friend Debbie broke a limb doing this very activity? You crazy!
It's no fun, but time to face reality that our skatin days are over... our glory days on the more fancy pom-poms to buy for your skates..
I hope you at least ended this session with one last game of "limbo". Sure wish I could've seen that. You bending way down to get under the pole. Mr. Dancin Queen probably did the splits as he went under, huh? :) Glad you didn't hurt anything more than your pride, sis.

Anonymous said...

I actually used to be really rockin' at roller skating and I secretly wish I could roller derby. But I know reality would sneak up on me and I'd break my tailbone... again. I need to take my kids skating. They're insured. :)

dariasdigs said...

Next time,try failing at skiing. Provided you can quickly learn to walk in the boots like a pro, the lodge is only a few short yards away, and failure can quickly become 'ouch, twisted my ankle', which gets you LOTS of free drinks. (Actually happened, sure can work again!) D

The Weathered Bungalow said...

I had a flashback of birthday parties at Roller Town where I would NEVER get asked to couple skate! Apparently it affected me more than I thought!! HA

xoxo, Meredith

Heather @ Gerber Days said...

Hahaha! That's hilarious!! Looks like a good time!