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Tuesday, May 4, 2010

I'm Not Crafty, So Shoot Me



I will never, ever, EVER get over the fact that I'm 'not crafty.'

It hurts bad, a throbbing not-tonight-dear headache sort of bad.


And I can't sing beautifully either. At least not well enough to audition for American Idol. *sigh*


I love music and art, but no. I'm unable to participate in these activities on any level other than below basic kindergarten. (Piano lessons for 6 years...I can't play a note or read music.) I'm only good at the kazoo, and even then I'm only ok, but drawing, painting, collage-making, sewing, CRAFTING? Fuh-get-about-it.


Why God why?


Probably because He gave me the 'fake English accent' ability. It's true, I do enjoy talking to myself randomly throughout the day as the daffy English lady, but still.


What if it gets cold outside and I outgrow all my sweaters and need to make one?


Or what if I'm the only one without laryngitis, and need to sing the National Anthem at the next Little League baseball game?


The quandaries of life. Some questions will never be answered. Thanks goodness for 'Pondering Tuesdays'. At least all the big, important questions get answered. The rest is just silly drivel and back-talk.

7 comments:

Sandy aka Doris the Great said...

Don't forget: He also gave you your good looks, girlish figure and the new husband. That's gotta equal 20-30 years of craftiness!

Unknown said...

Haha! So true Sandy. Who cares if I can't make...anything. I'll just go gaze for a while upon my beauty and plant a big one on my hubby. :)

Alex@LateEnough said...

I would LOVE to have a fake English accent... or even real one. You definitely won that contest.

Heather said...

Well if it makes you feel any better, I actually DID try out for American Idol in New York. I'm not the next American Idol, obviously. :(

Unknown said...

Heather, I think we bloggers should be the ones to decide if you actually ARE the REAL American Idol. We're much better judges of these kinds of things. So, vlog it baby...we wanna hear you sing!

Alex, dahling, don't try to lie to me. I know you can speak in a fake English accent. You have a medical degree for heaven's sake! :)

Kate said...

I love this!
For me, crafts are all about good enough. I can't be bothered to measure just so (sewing isn't a forte) or cut straight (no, my scissor skills are close to those of my almost 5 year old).
But I can bake. Because it's a forgiving art form. But not on the hips.
And thanks for stopping by too!

The Pendle's -- 3700 Mtn Cove Rd said...

Hilarious!