Pages

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Why, Yes I Did, Thankyou for Asking

It's times like these and friends like you that make me want to...
Smile? Noooooo.... Scream with the agony of defeat? Maaayyybeee...
 Why? Because, Father, I have sinned and I would really prefer to confess anonymously  from behind a thick curtain. The curtain of shame.  But no. Instead I will post my foibles, my flaws, my terrible gluttonous tendencies on the world wide web for all to see and Judge.

Let me put it to you this way. I hath eateneth more than I shouldeth...

Spark People was no match for Turkey Day. The motivational talks, the promises I made to myself, the tracking of the food...wasted. Totally wasted.   My downfall began with TWO FABULOUS Thanksgiving meals, one with turkey, one with ham, then a football party, laden with marvelously fattening hors d'oeuvres, where in fact Mr. Wonderful tried to keep me from having dessert. BIG MISTAKE. I had the World Wrestling Federation threaten to sue for stealing some of their most famous moves. (Once I had him in the headlock, punchdown, knee-in-the-groin twist around,  he knew it was over. Give the fat girl her pie.)  Then a  road trip from Alabama to Georgia, and on to Tennesee.

But, I'm back now. I woke up at 5:30am, went to the Y, and DIED. This is my ghost writing these words...

3 comments:

Alisha said...

Oh EM GEE! I totally died Thursday after I ate more than I had in months. Since May, at least. We're talking 8 lbs worth of food in one day. I didn't buck up and go to the Y, though. So massive kudos to you for that.

Allyson & Jere said...

Hey, all that matters is that you start anew each day. You can't live in the past. At least you ENJOYED your turkey day right? woo hoo!

Lisa said...

What a terrible, horrible shame...that we have to feel guilty for enjoying the GLUTTONY THAT IS Thanksgiving. And I'm thankful for it, so isn't that what it's all about? Yes, it is. So cut yourself some slack and undie. I hate funerals.